Kids Parties and Urban Botanic

Happy birthday to you, you live in a zoo...

I posted a while back about why Urban Botanic is a great idea for birthday parties. Now that I can talk the walk, or walk the talk (or however that saying goes!), I thought I'd share a few insights, procedures, and lessons learned about doing UB birthday parties.

To get the word out about doing childrens parties there are lots of options. You can spend money on a classified ad in a local parenting publication (I ran one through the year with a parenting magazine here in Seattle). Better yet, you can list your UB business for FREE on an online parenting resource for your city or region. A popular one that I used is GoCityKids.com (they have listings for other cities besides Seattle). One thing to note is because these are free, don't be surprised if your listing is edited for length. Parents go to these types of resources in droves because, even in larger cities, there aren't a gazillion birthday party options. And best of all, UB offers kids something completely NEW that hasn't been done a gazillion times.

Once you have advertised that you do birthday parties, be prepared for inquiries. And especially be aware that these inquiries might come directly from the birthday child. I recently had a very industrious young 12 year old contact me directly via email about scheduling her party (!!). It took a few emails back and forth before I realized I was conversing with such a young customer. My intuition told me to ask her if it was for a special occasion and she replied that it was for her birthday. So, I now routinely ask in the first correspondence if it is for a special event or occasion!

You should also think about your policies surrounding birthday parties. Because we don't (as of yet) have set guidelines from corporate, I looked at the policies that other party entertainers in my area list. I ask that the birthday parent decide what "package" they want (i.e. what products they are purchasing for the guests) and an estimate of how many guests will be attending. I then invoice them (using PayPal) for 50% deposit of the estimated party total before the party (up to two weeks before). This secures their date. Then, the remainder is due the day of the party.

If a party host needs to cancel an event giving me two weeks notice, I reserve the right to retain the 50% deposit. If an event needs to be cancelled with less than 48 hour notice, I reserve the right to bill the host for the entire cost of the party. If for some reason I need to cancel an event due to an emergency, I will refund their deposit.

I also spell out that I don't provide food or decorations and that a UB party typically lasts two hours.

If the expected attendance for a party is more than 6 children, I let the host parent know that I would appreciate their being present during the workshop to help out if needed. If a party exceeds 10 children, depending on their ages, I would actually bring a second Fragrance Designer and would tack on an extra charge (I haven't had a party be larger than 10 yet, so I don't have that part totally figured out).

Okay. All pre-party duckies are lined up. Now, on to the actual party...

I structure my birthday parties a little differently than a regular UB party. For example, I don't follow the flip book, I don't do the personality test, I don't explain about becoming a Fragrance Designer, etc. If the parent (or parents of guests are there), I might hand them a business card if they seem interested in UB. But I don't go over that info during the party.

Here is what I have done:

• I set up the table like normal. If the product package is more than 2 products, I put it in a fun gift bag**; if it's just one product I tie a cute ribbon around it with a cute tag**.


• I briefly explain about the product that they will be taking home (what it is, that it's hypoallergenic, etc.).


• I have the party guests smell some of the sample recipes. I specifically bring the "lighter" ones and include a recipe I call Sugar Cookie (similar to Shawna's Just Baked). I have extra copies of those scent recipes that I can hand out if that is what someone chooses.
  
• Before they start smelling, I tell them to make sure and write down which oils they like. I also ask that they narrow that list down to their favorite 3-5 scents after finishing the smelling.
• Then I explain that there are 66 oils in different scent families. I point out that the Woodsies might be ones they won't like but I encourage them to smell them anyway.


• They begin smelling. It's so fun to watch and listen to their reactions!


• Once they've pretty much smelled them all, I stop them. I will ask them again which of the samples they liked and if the party is small enough, I will look at their lists to offer guidance.


• Then they begin creating their scent.

MAKE SURE to demonstrate (with each child if possible) what a drop looks like. Then watch and make sure they are writing down each drop. This is where they get to play and have fun! I suggest having a lot of extra mixing glasses as there will likely be a lot of "do-overs". Just like a regular party, offer advice and encouragement in helping them create their scents.

Once they have their recipes decided, I suggest having the party switch gears and move on to another activity, like cake and presents (in another area of the house). Then you can batch and blend their scents into their products. Also, write up names/recipes and tape the backs of bottles.

If the children are more mature, and they want to, you can let them help batch and blend. I suggest doing the math for them and writing out their batch recipe line by line so they can follow it and count out the drops. I would only do this if the party was less than 5 guests total and you had another adult to help.

**One idea I came up with is to have some product info that goes home with each party guest. Parents of these children might be curious (and possibly concerned) about the product their child has brought home. I suggest including a card of some sort that explains about the products (hypoallergenic) and says that if they have questions or want more information, they can contact you. Then give them your web address, etc. This also helpful if they want to book you for their child's party! :)

I have been pleasantly surprised at the creativity and sophistication that children show when creating their own scents. It is so much fun and very satisfying seeing the joy they get from UB!

Giveaways and Contests

Winner, winner, chicken dinner!

There is a lot of advice out there about how to gain exposure for your Urban Botanic business. Of special interest to most of us are ways to gain exposure and new customers on the cheap. One of the methods that is suggested quite often is to run a contest or sponsor a product giveaway.

Do contests and giveaways "work"? Well, it depends on your goal or what you want the outcome to be. I think the important thing that you ought to be realistic about is whether your goal is to make sales by doing a giveaway or contest or if your goal is simply to get your name out there.

Think about it. Are the people who clamor for free things really looking to buy something if they don't win? Or are they really just looking for a cool new thing for free?

My feeling is the latter.

Is there anything wrong with that? No.

I'd like to share with you my experience doing an online UB giveaway. I had the great privilege of being asked by a well-known blog to sponsor an Urban Botanic giveaway. And I can tell you, I think I may have had my goals mixed up at first. My naive assumption was that the nearly 200 women who signed up for the giveaway would immediately become customers once they found out they didn't win. I was actually quite wrong in that assumption. I did not receive the rush of orders that I expected at the conclusion of the giveaway.

Now...I don't want to give you the impression that I consider the experience a failure. I did achieve a very important goal of getting exposure for my Urban Botanic business. The blog owner told me she had hits averaging 800-900 each day of the giveaway which is fantastic! And through this exposure, I added a team member who otherwise might not have heard of UB. I also gained awareness with an incredibly savvy audience of women. The blog who featured the giveaway has a readership of amazingly creative, sophisticated women.

So I wholeheartedly view my experience a huge success. And, depending on the venue or who the audience might be, I would consider doing another giveaway. But this is key - who the audience would be and whether gaining more awareness to them is going to be beneficial to my UB business.

Here is one other important consideration...don't assume that just because someone signed up for your contest or giveaway (and perhaps gave you their email address or other contact information) that they really do want to receive more information from you. Be mindful about what other people might consider spam. In Washington state, for example, sending spam email is actually against the law. And it could cost you a bundle of money if someone really decided to pursue the matter. I say this because if your purpose for doing a contest or giveaway is to gather contacts for your marketing newsletters or promotions, you should think carefully about that.

All in all, I do recommend that you consider doing a giveaway or a contest as a way to market your business. I just suggest you do it with realistic expectations, clear motives, and really think about how implementing this tactic could benefit you.

Start Now for Urban Botanic School Fundraisers

Didn't it seem like the time between Spring Break and the last day of school took FOREVER when you were a student? I can remember in elementary school just being filled with anticipation E-V-E-R-Y S-I-N-G-L-E excrutiating loooong D-A-Y for Field Day, our annual end of the school year ritual where we actually got to wear shorts to school (shorts! to school!!!) and win ribbons for exciting feats of athleticism like the 3-legged race.

Now, doesn't it seem like as a parent those last 6-8 weeks of a school year just fly by in an absolute chaotic blur? I work at a school, too, so it really feels like a blur where we are all running around in a manic daze just trying to get things done.

And then BOOM it seems like in no time at all, it's the beginning of a new school year.

For most school groups, they begin planning out their year at the beginning of a school year if not before. And they do this during all of the hubbub and buzz of a brand new year. It stands to reason that this could be why many groups tend to do the same fundraisers year after year. If it ain't broke, why fix it? There are so many other things to think about and crossing your fundraising plan off the to-do list is even easier if you stick to what you've already been doing.

This is why I recommend that if you want to approach a school group to do an Urban Botanic fundraiser, you get in contact with them now. The group coordinator (usually a school administrator or teacher) will likely have some time to mull over the idea during the summer break. You might even be able to meet with her or him to go over questions and work out a plan for implementing an Urban Botanic fundraiser before the new school year hits.

Now if you are reading this thinking "but, Kelsey, I haven't even THOUGHT of using Urban Botanic to do a fundraiser!", let me outline some of the reasons you should consider it:

• It's great exposure for your business.
  
• It gets your name in front of people right in your own backyard
  
• There is a high likelihood of repeat orders


• You stand a great chance of booking some parties
  
• You also stand a great chance of building your team through meeting new potential consultants
  
• It's great PR to say you helped raise money for a youth organization/group/team

How you would structure the fundraiser is up to you. A great example is Lauri Hetzer in Ohio. She has a plan to do a cheerleader fundraiser where she is giving them a cut of her commission and is selling a 3-product set as a presale. Then, she will be scheduling workshops for people to come make their scent and blend it into the pre-purchased products. I think it sounds like a winner!

I also found a great template letter that you can use to send off to a group who might be interested in doing a UB fundraiser. I suggest calling the school or organization and getting the name of the person coordinating the group so you can address it directly to her. You can customize the wording on the letter as you see fit but it gives you a great starting point.

http://www.mymommybiz.com/party/fundraisers/sampleletter.html

Now, go forth and fundraise!

Office Decorating Daydreams

Just doing a little online visualization about my future home office setup for my Urban Botanic business. I recently purchased a new computer, new flat panel monitor, and a color laser printer.

Now if I only had a swanky space to put it all in...

Like these options from Pottery Barn and Home Office Furnishings (cabinetry by Taghkanic Woodworking in the bottom left):

And just look at this sexy desk from ScanDesign...oh MY! It has Melrose Place written all over it!And these two options shown in Blueprint (Martha's new mag which I lurve...). I would mix a little of each style to fit my own.

And finally, a super-sophisticated, sleek home office...maybe a little too minimalist for my taste but SO gorgie! From the portfolio of Valenta Taber Architects....YUM!

Getting More Hours in a Day

I have not been posting as often as I normally do. This is mostly to do with a big deadline on the magazine I design at work. I'm happy to say it has gone to the printer so I'm able to have a little more balance in my life right now.

But this got me thinking...how are some ways I can better manage my time? I know that I have a lot on my plate and I consider myself to be a productive person. But we are ALL busy...isn't that the phrase you hear all the time? Sorry I didn't do X, I've just been so busy...if only there were more hours in the day!

I found an interesting article that gives some tangible ways you can build more time in your day and be more productive. Personally, I am going to adopt two ideas from the article. I'm going to start getting some books on CD to make my commute each day more educational. I also know I could save a lot of time if I could stop compulsively checking my email every 10 minutes!

And some day I very much plan on having an assistant! ;)

Here's an idea: I think for many of us, that hour we could save by turning off the TV (as suggested in the article) should be an hour we spend nurturing ourselves. Because when we say we are so busy, I think we are really saying we are stressed and could use some "me" time.

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Ten Ways to Save 2 Hours A Day or More!
by Chris Widener
article found at http://www.mlm.com/mlm/user/mlmarticles

When you gain 2 hours a day, that is 14 hours a week and a whopping 728 hours a year or 18.2 workweeks!

Take a look at the list below and implement a few - if not all - of them and see how much time you gain this week and how much more you accomplish! (Note: The time saved listed is per day! They are also very conservative estimates.)

1. Turn off the TV. We may as well start at the easy one. The average person watches 3 hours a day. So turn it off for one of those hours. Do something else instead. Read a book. Better yet, start writing YOUR book! Time saved - One hour.

2. Group your projects together. Do all you email at once or make all your calls at once. Starting and stopping wastes a lot of time. Time saved - 15 minutes.

3. Don't answer the phone. Let it go to voice mail. Then, at a set time, listen to the voice mail, delete liberally, and write down the info on a pad to call back when it is best for you. Talk to them only about the issue at hand. Time saved - 30 minutes. Another 30 if you count the telemarketers you avoid.

4. Get up 15 minutes earlier. Go to bed 15 minutes later. If your alarm goes off every day at 6 am, make it 5:45. You don't need that much sleep anyway! Time saved - 30 minutes!

5. Enroll in what Zig Ziglar calls "Automobile University." I have a friend that uses his library card like nobody's business and always has the best cd's with him. And it costs him nothing. He listens to close to ten hours of great material a week. All while in the car. Time saved - 1 hour.

6. Cut your lunch short. No matter how much you take, shave 15 minutes off of it. Side benefit: You'll lose weight without the dessert! Time saved - 15 minutes.

7. Hire an assistant. Let him or her do the smaller tasks like answering email, copying, screening calls, and filing. Time saved - 1 hour.

8. Focus. Different people are distracted by different things. Whatever it is that distracts you, cut it out. Tune it out and lock in like a laser on your work. You will save time and your work will be better! Time saved - 30 minutes.

9. Shift you work hours to include time when others aren't at the office. Being there alone will help you stay on task and you will be shocked at how much you get done. Time saved - 15 minutes.

10. Plan. Spend 15 minutes a day planning your day to work on the most important tasks in the most efficient way. You will lose 15 minutes but gain an hour. Total saved - 45 minutes.

Total if you do them all: 6 hours a day of time saved, improved focus and a dramatic increase in productivity! If you will just implement a few of these - those that work best for you - you will see a dramatic improvement in your time management and productivity - I guarantee it!
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What can you do right now to gain some time in your day? :)

Coaching (and I don't mean the handbags!)

With several of us, myself included, recently reaching our goal of UB Scentsational, we are now in the position of leading a team. Of course we are so fortunate to have our fearless leader of The Hive, Shawna Straub, keeping us all organized and on track. And she is a tremendous resource, as we all know!

I found this article that talks about Principle-Centered Coaching which I thought was very apropos. I imagine that a lot of us bring to Urban Botanic a track record of leadership and management. However, several of us are new to direct sales and we are ALL new to Urban Botanic. This articles describes a method of mentoring that I felt was very in line with the company mission and values.

Enjoy!

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Open Your Heart To Coaching
By Jane Deuber
President and Co-Founder of the DSWA
article found at http://www.mlm.com/mlm/user/mlmarticles

Leading in the Spirit of Service
If you’re a leader with a growing organization, you’ve probably been told that you should be coaching your team members. Perhaps you’re wondering, “Be a coach? What does that mean and how can I expect to coach others when I’m just figuring it out for myself?” The answer lies in something called Principle-Centered Coaching—a way of working with your team that opens your heart and expands your capacity to lead in the spirit of service.

To Coach Is To Serve; To Serve Is To Succeed
The foundation of Principle-Centered Coaching is built upon five core principles that present an image—a model if you will—of the kind of coach you want to be. Using these principles, you will cultivate a supportive, safe environment in which your team will flourish.

· The Principle of Trust: An environment of trust is defined by faith, confidence, and belief in your team—and to keep a confidence. Trust is the basis of meaningful, healthy relationships and must be present to create openness, learning, and growth.

· The Principle of Respect: When you show respect for another, you interact with dignity and kindness. You honor others no matter their accomplishments or perceived abilities. Giving and receiving respect builds self-esteem and confidence.

· The Principle of Service: When we serve others through our actions, we express the essence of leadership. By helping others get what that want, we experience the joy of making a difference.

· The Principle of Integrity: Do you do what you say you will do? Integrity is when our thoughts, words, and actions are the same and we follow through on our commitments.

· The Principle of Authenticity: An authentic leader is comfortable being herself and does not put on appearances. Strive to be natural, genuine, and honest in your dealings with your team.

Rich Rewards
Once you weave these five principles into the fabric of your interactions you will see shifts at many levels. Some subtle, some obvious, but collectively they are transformational. Here is just a taste of what you can expect.

You will…
· Enjoy coaching your team so much more when you call to support rather than to fix.

· Sense a deeper connection with your team as they see your willingness to serve and support.

· See your team grow as you see each new team member as a gift instead of more work and responsibility.

Your team members will…
· Feel confident in their ability to build their business.

· Be accountable to themselves and their goals.

· Be true to their word because the team values integrity.

· Remain clear, focused, and on track toward success.

Ways to Explore the Five Core Principles
Beginning today, hold yourself to the standard of keeping these five core principles at heart in all team interactions. At day’s end, reflect on how you have lived these principles, and then marvel at the magic that results.

This is an excerpt from the best selling book Build It Big – 101 Insider Secrets Form Top Direct Selling Experts, brought to you by the Direct Selling Women’s Alliance (DSWA). The DSWA provides industry-specific education, resources and support to direct sellers in more than twelve countries, representing over 275 companies. To learn how you can receive $850 in bonus gifts by ordering the Build It Big book, visit http://www.mydswa.org/bib.asp. To learn about the benefits of becoming a member of the DSWA, visit http://www.mydswa.org/member_program.asp.

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Wed, Thurs, Fri...etc.

The last part of my week was a blur. Here is just a brief list of what happened and what I accomplished...

I received my cards from VistaPrint and I have to say they look great. They are going out today (Monday)

We got our car back from being fixed - new front brakes at 26K!! I can't believe it. I think I want a new car!

I added a new team member - Avis from California. Yay!

I heard from a lifestyle editor of a popular local wedding blog. I am just waiting to set up a day/time to meet with her. I'm super excited about this!

I sent out a promo for Mother's Day to 40 women. I did this through Constanct Contact and used a direct link to PayPal.

My daughter continued to get sicker, adding a severe cough to her fever. I spent 3 hours in urgent care with her yesterday. She had chest x-rays done to rule out pneumonia. Luckily she doesn't have pneumonia, just a really, really bad cold.

We finally tackled the garage. We hauled out a truck full of junk that was just trash to go to the dump. Of the remaining items in the garage, over 2/3 are earmarked for a garage sale (maybe this upcoming weekend?) and the remaining 1/3 are things to keep. Phew!

And the last bit of news is that I qualified for UB Scentsational with a week to spare! Hooray!!! It certainly feels good to achieve a goal like that! :)

Tuesday & Wednesday

My how this week has just flown by...

My daughter has caught some kind of virus and has had a fever off and on since Sunday. Yesterday it was 102.7! Poor thing, not a very fun spring break for her.

Tuesday
Booked two parties
Emailed boutique for customer appreciation event
Spoke with an awesome potential new fragrance designer

Wednesday
Got a tentative booking for a birthday party (very exciting!)
Sent out a lotion sample to the potential new team member
Developed list for customer appreciation leads
Have two more tentative parties scheduled, just need to nail down the dates/times

I think my VistaPrint postcards should arrive today so I can do my wedding mailer!

Monday's Progress

Here are some of the things I accomplished today:

Attended The Hive Talkin' call
Posted ads on Craigslist
Followed up on three party leads

I also did a few hours of housework, took the car to get fixed, went to the post office, and minded two sick kiddos.

I did not begin to tackle the HUGE disaster area that is my garage...LOL

Focusing on Urban Botanic

I am off from work for a week. Well...I am off from my full-time job but rather than actually taking a vacation, I am going to be focusing my energy on my Urban Botanic business along with sorting through my excess belongings for a garage sale at the end of the week.

I am making a game plan for the week where I am going to jump-start things for the Spring and Summer season. I haven't quite figured out my concrete goals for the week but I will post those along with my progress every day!

The first steps I have taken are to order up some postcards from Vista Print, they should be here by week's end. How is it that "free" postcards ended up costing $23? haha

The postcards are to target wedding-oriented businesses to interest them in hosting an after-hours or VIP bride fragrance party. Using a lot of the text that Shawna posted a few weeks ago, here is a picture of what I designed:

Unstoppable Achievers

One thing that I so enjoy about my life since joining Urban Botanic is the sense of control and possibility I feel about my future. I think I have always had that tendency to focus on the possibilities in life and have goals but I can also look back on times where I wasn't as proactive as I could have been, allowing myself to "float" along or spin my wheels.

I found another article I'd like to share that points to the connection between how we spend our time now with what we will achieve later. That it isn't enough to just have goals but in order to achieve them, you need to become the person who deserves them.

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The Real Secret of Unstoppable Achievers
By Dr Jill Ammon-Wexler
Executive Advisor
article found at http://www.mlm.com/mlm/user/mlmarticles

What marks the difference between the person who achieves their goals and the person who doesn't? How many times have you been told the difference is just having a definite, well-defined goal?

Actually that is putting the cart before the horse, and it's not really true. You can have a serious goal and still never even come close to achieving it. In fact, that goal might even end up further eroding your self-confidence.

Why is this so? Because just having a goal does NOT magically bring your desire into reach. Neither does creating a detailed goal plan.

The difference between those who actually achieve their goals and those who do not is this: Non-achievers put the cart before the horse. Achievers hook the horse up to the cart.

How Success is Really Attained
Almost every one of today's success gurus tell you to focus your energy on your desired end result. On the surface it may seem wise to focus your energy on your desired end result -- on your goal.

But in terms of how people actually achieve true success -- this is an example of the classic case of putting the cart before the horse.

The truth is -- success is not attained when you achieve a desired goal. Success is actually the process of becoming the person to whom that desired goal belongs.

How to Become a Top Achiever
The real difference between achievers and failures is the way they live their daily lives. Every successful person became who they are because of how they live their daily lives.

In short: Your daily lifestyle determines your success. You actually become a success the millisecond you commit to live a daily lifestyle focused on success. This puts the horse (your daily actions and beliefs) before the cart (your end goal).

This applies to success in any field or endeavor whether business, personal, or social. If you want to achieve a goal of being fit and healthy, for example, you do so by adopting a daily lifestyle focused on regular exercise and healthy eating habits.

If you want to achieve a goal of having your own million-plus business, you do so by adopting a daily lifestyle focused on developing the skills and attitudes of a multi-millionaire business person.

Some Real-Life Examples
Still need convincing? What do you think the lifestyle of mega-successful people was before they achieved their current levels of success?

Do you think Oprah spent five hours every evening watching soap operas? Or maybe Anthony Robbins spent every evening drinking beer with his buddies and watching sports videos? Maybe Tina Turner just sat around eating potato chips and reading magazines? Or perhaps Gina Davis just hung around the mall drinking coffee?

Are these silly questions? Of course! But in fact these examples are exactly how a lot of unsuccessful people spend their time.

A Simple Action Plan
I realize this may sound incredible, but in fact becoming a success IS simple. It may not be easy, but it certainly isn't complicated. If you truly desire success, it is created one day at a time.

Just go to work on a daily basis. What you do EACH DAY is what determines if you will (or will not) achieve the success you desire. This IS the major difference between the achievers and the would-be, could be's. Your daily actions truly determine your destiny.

Former President Ronald Reagan once said: "Status Quo is Latin for 'the mess we are in.'" The status quo is actually your "comfort zone." Reagan's tongue-in-cheek quote reminds us that just doing the same old comfortable things actually creates a mess rather than new levels of success.

Get your horse out in front of your cart. You can have the success you desire IF you are willing to adopt a DAILY lifestyle that will result in goal achievement.

Take bold action!

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The Red Door Example

The subject of networking, making connections, and "putting yourself out there" has been coming up a lot lately in our Urban Botanic network. I'm pretty sure this is always going to be a central theme, particularly for those of us who haven't been in sales before and as our teams grow.

I came across this great article (that seems to be quite popular as its linked in several places!) that talks about a system that two women created in Atlanta called The Red Door. There are lots of great tidbits here, happy reading!

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The Red Door
by Bonnie Ross-Parker
found at http://www.mlm.com/mlm/user/mlmarticles

Women need mentors. From both a practical and a feminine point of view, mentors for women are it.

Having come late to the “good ol’ boy” networks that men have developed for years, women have had to create their own ways to build relationships in the business world. As women in business have proven themselves to treasure conversation and teamwork, working with mentors seems like a natural thing. It plays right into the powerful traits women possess.

So, what if we created a weekly free mentoring program for professional women! Well, why not?

My friend Kirsten Farris and I developed this idea for entrepreneurs and any women interested in starting a business. We recognized that many women were not getting the support they needed. Existing networking events weren’t the right place to support the need for business growth. They are merely a place to exchange business cards.

So we created a mentoring program and called it The Red Door. We met every Tuesday morning at a local Atlanta Bread Company. We occupied a side room. It was a great place to obtain morning coffee and a bagel or pastry. We set up the tables to form a large square and placed chairs around the perimeter. Each participant had five minutes to introduce herself, share with the other women what she does, and give us specific progress on the intention she stated the week before. This format held each person accountable or offered support when life interfered with unmet goals, which was not uncommon! The underlying understanding was that each one of us was there to support, honor, and do what we could to keep every participant on track with their plan. “Red” represented energy and “Door” indicated an opening to the future. Our tag line became “bringing energy to ideas to create unlimited possibilities.”

We had no idea that the response would be so great, nor the significance our time and effort would have. Were we in for a surprise! The participation grew weekly. Regulars came faithfully and brought friends. Suddenly we were servicing a large group of entrepreneurial women eager to learn, implement new ideas, and support one another.

From one week to the next, women would report on their previous week’s progress and challenges. With the support of their mentors and colleagues, many remained determined to stay on course and strengthen their businesses. We introduced affirmations, spoke our intentions, and encouraged accountability. Women helped each other, and met often between sessions to keep the flow of ideas and momentum going.

Different from other networking groups established for lead generation, The Red Door offered a safe, nurturing space for open dialogue, honest assessment, and a non-threatening environment – perfect for women. For some of our participants, it was their first introduction to mentoring. The Red Door became a foundation for them to go out into the world with their talents, ideas, businesses, and confidence. Kirsten and I know that the contribution of our time, expertise, and connection played a significant role in the success of the women we served. That alone was ample reward.

Talented Businesswoman
Kirsten is an amazing, talented woman. She’s brilliant, energetic, and overflows with ideas and enthusiasm as a businesswoman and horse whisperer. She had been in telecommunications sales and marketing for most of her career. She’d moved in and out of the corporate world before starting her own company in 2000. No matter what challenge or question I have, she magically whips up what I need to do or hear. Kirsten takes me under her wing by offering fresh ideas and encouragement. Kirsten and I connected immediately at a luncheon networking function. When I sat down next to her, I asked, “What do you do for fun?” From that one question, Kirsten shared with me her unique perspective on connecting. Here’s what she said:

“Really, connecting is not about the questions you ask, because, quite frankly, if someone other than you had asked me ‘what do you do for fun?’ I might be thinking, I’m not telling this person anything! Just because you ask the question doesn’t mean you’re going to get the answer! Because I sensed you were genuine, I struck up a conversation.”

Yes, connecting is more complicated than it seems. Connecting is not just walking up to another person and striking up a conversation. Before you can connect, you’ve got to be connected with yourself and your purpose. You have to be genuine.

Discover Your Purpose
How do you discover your purpose? It comes from being aligned with yourself and what you believe in. So how do you get yourself aligned? Therein lies the problem.

We can be very dysfunctional and incongruent. Our conscious minds and our subconscious minds can be out of alignment, out of whack. To find alignment and purpose, we start by discovering our truth and coming into our power. From there, we need to understand that it’s all about everybody else. We ask, “How can I help, how can I serve? How can I help people get what they want?”

Connecting is a way of life – not just something you do at meetings, but how you choose to live your life.

To be a connector, you need to be in the realm of helping facilitate transactions between events, people, and things. Get out there, be yourself and be genuine; from there, everything else will fall into place. That’s why it’s important for people to determine how to get ready.

Kirsten says connection is all there is. In her words, “If you’re not connected, you’re disconnected. Connection to me is about being abundant and having infinite possibilities. Being disconnected is very limited.”

Kirsten feels disconnected at times. She knows that the first step to becoming connected again is to acknowledge feeling disconnected, then getting back in sync.

Do you feel a little depressed? Are you going to do something about it? Do you want to change it? When?

Sometimes, you may want to wallow in the fact that you don’t want to do anything at that moment. That’s okay, because that’s the way energy works. But as Kirsten likes to say, “To make my life work, I have to be in choice. When I choose to do something, I never feel trapped.”

It’s About Helping Others
Kirsten and I have similar beliefs about networking. We believe it’s not about you and it’s not about handing out cards. It’s about getting to know people and understanding how you can help them. It’s about getting to help someone or being involved in a group. You might not get anything tangible from that group, but because you’re doing the right thing, good things happen for you. Kirsten and I share that philosophy.

Indeed, true connections are like that. For me, it’s nice to find someone like Kirsten who’s willing to do things for people because it feels good, and not because she’ll get something out of it.

It’s a way of life. It’s about being open to connect people, and when you do so, you get connected someplace else.

Kirsten says, “You get there by becoming involved in a group similar to The Red Door or The Joy of Connecting – by networking with people whoa re trying to find their purpose and working through exercises that help you determine that purpose. Joining connection groups allows you to just meet and talk with many different people who can steer you onto the right path. Once you’re open to it, you just kind of say, ‘OK, I’m ready for the next thing – bring it on!’ Within 24 hours, great stuff will show up!”

Bonnie Ross-Parker is a multi-dimensional businesswoman/entrepreneur with a background in education, franchise development, publishing, mentorship, network marketing, and community development. Her articles on owning one’s own business and entrepreneurship have appeared in publications such as Wealth Building, Home Business Magazine, Business to Business and Entrepreneur’s Business Start-Ups. In 2002 Bonnie received The Athena Award—an honor designed to acknowledge women of leadership in cities throughout the United States. She is the author of Walk in my Boots – The Joy of Connecting. Contact Bonnie at 770-333-9028 bootgirl@bonnierossparker.com or www.bonnierossparker.com

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